I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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