I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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