Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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