You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
