My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize