is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
