in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
