Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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