dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
she woke up with a sticky ear
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
