I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Randomize