He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
