whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
