Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
