We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
