i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
i out mim tonsoeep
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