You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize