She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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