I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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