summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
