i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
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