she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
