How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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