I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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