Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize