I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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