Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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