I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
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