no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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