Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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