oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
