I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
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