so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
he shaved USA in his pubs
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
this is an emotional support booty call
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
