is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
