I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize