better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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