butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
