well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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