I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
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