six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize