I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Randomize
