I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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