the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
