Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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