I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize