so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
