He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
