But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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