i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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