forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
