so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
why didn't you poke me back
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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