Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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